It's been a busy week trying to play catch up after being gone all week. So far, I've not been too overwhelmed. Tomorrow is going to be an exciting day!! I am going to Charlotte to attend the Women of Faith conference with my best friend from high school. I am glad that we're going! I've not seen her in probably 3 or 4 years...but like with many best friends, you pick up as if no days have passed. Lynne and I are so much alike. I think that even though I'm not a "astrological" person, there HAS to be something to our "SCORPIO" personalities. Even when we talked tonite, we both described the same outfit that we'd wear! Amazing. One big difference with Lynne is that she has a 3 year old little girl (named after me, as my daughter is named after her). We both have grown kids and her oldest daughter is even married. Amazing how life continues to go on and on.

Well, I am home!! After a long, busy, fun and somewhat relaxing week, I am home! We had an incredible time as we began our adventure in New York City! What an amazing town! We were so shocked that all the horrible things and preconcieved ideas that we'd always heard about New Yorkers was thrown out the window! We really were shocked that people were nice and friendly and often so much more so than the South Floridians that we were used to. None the less, it was great. We were moved at the sight of Ground Zero as we overlooked it from our Hotel. We continued on the next day to join the thousands of others for the next week throughout Canada and New England. I can't even begin to tell all of the things we've experienced. The colorful leaves, the crisp cool air...all of it was amazing.

My trip was interrupted with some of the most shocking and devastating news I could have ever invisioned. I received an email telling me that a friend of mine in my choir, handbell group and the daughter of one of my best friends at church was arrested for trying to hire a hitman to kill her husband. She was going to pay the man $10,000 to kill him. The unbelievable part was that the Wednesday nite before my trip we were sitting at church supper as usual and she began talking too about a 'surprise trip' she was taking her husband on. I think back at it and have the strangest feeling wondering if she was planning a vacation that the surprise was to be that he never came back! How terrible to think that she has lost an amazing job at a country club, a very sweet and providing husband, two beautiful precious boys and now her freedom. As it stands now, she has no bail available and not many are able to see her. Even her mother has told her that she need not try to lie herself out, but admit it and take what is coming to her. Please pray for this family. The woman arrested is Laura Overton and her mother and step father, my dear dear friends are Becky and Scott McCrary. Thanks for your prayers.

Tonite is the NIGHT BEFORE my big trip with my Aunt Lolo!! She is taking me with her on a cruise to Canada and New England. I will go to work for just a couple hours tomorrow and then head to the airport en route to Ft. Lauderdale. I will stay with Lois over nite and we'll head for NY. I am excited about going to NY. I've never been before and I think it will be a fabulous trip. We will leave NY on Sunday on the Grand Princess which I think is a bigger ship than we've ever sailed.

If you read this, say a prayer for Tom as he will have a committee in our Sunday service to observe. We pray that God will open the door for us if it is his will. We are completely seeking that and trusting him!
I probably will be out of commission until Sunday 10.24...Thanks for your prayers...Blessings to all my blogger friends!

God Answers Prayers.
We know that and we believe that.
But I was reminded today that he doesn't always answer the way we hope.

My prayer this morning was:

"Please God, let us find out something about Tom's job - one way or another. Let us find out something. You know I'm going out of town all next week and I'd love to know something."

My answer came this afternoon.

"The pastor called and he and the committee chairman want to meet with me this afternoon."

The only problem was my answer wasn't the ultimate answer I'd hoped for. Yes, we found out something 'one way or the other',

but the answer was:

"You've been a great healer for our music ministry, however..."

Say no more, I knew the end result. As much as they love us (their words), we still for some reason aren't what they're looking for! They haven't found anyone else, but they just aren't selecting us. I have very strange and mixed feelings.

Sad
Depressed
Discouraged
Dissapointed
Rejected
Used
Hurt

I understand that I shouldn't feel this way, that I should be happy and excited that God is going to work in some other way. For some reason, that's just not happening yet. Perhaps it will. I hope it will, I pray it will.

Father, give me the comfort and encouragement that I need in an abandoned moment. Bring me a sense of security and confidence that you really do have our best interest at heart. I am at a point where I have NO CHOICE but rely completely on you....Have I not been this way for over a year???

I got up this morning thinking that it would be my typical Saturday...Coffee, Today Show, Grocery List and ultimately REAL COFFEE (Starbucks) and the Grocery Store. I have no doubt that those things will eventually come to pass. There was this morning, however, one small difference. Tom has been preparing and has now completed a long over due video tape as a resume type tape. I had procrastinated in watching it because I am never really impressed with those types of things because the quality generally diminishes the truth to what really is intended to be seen. At any rate, I turned it on to watch in order to be able to say when he gets up, "Oh, I watched your tape and it is fine." (Knowing that I couldn't be truthfully honest because he would feel that I was being critical of his long hours of efforts). Unbeknownst to me, I was terribly disturbed, saddened and extrememly emotional. I sat in the floor and wept and prayed to God, asking through my tears, "WHY, WHY, why is it that you know our hearts and the passion that we have for these youth? Why is it that you know the gifts and abilities that we have in communicating with them? Why is it that we have the unusual ability to relate to them and draw out from them things that other directors so often do not understand?" I continued to watch as the youth sang, performed their dramas, dowel rod routines and laughed and smiled as they genuinely enjoyed what they were doing. I do not understand! As much as I desire to and really do trust God and his ultimate wisdom, my heart still aches. Sometimes I feel like the man in the Bible who questioned why the man had been born blind. "Rabbi, who sinned this man or his parents." Then God quietly reminded me (even just this moment as I cross referenced this passage for accuracy) "Neither this man or his parents have sinned. But this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life." WOW! My '2x4' has just been relocated upon my head!

An emotional morning already??? YES!
An impacting morning already??? ABSOLUTELY!
I am in a growth experience and Growing pains are just that, PAINFUL. Yet in the midst of pain, there is growth! I KNOW that when God is ready, and maybe more importantly when He feels WE are ready, great things will continue to happen.

Oh God, you know the desires of our heart
You promised to fullfill those desires when we commit to you
We commit to you
We wait for you
We desire to see you at work in us
above and beyond our expectations

This morning's devotion was beautiful! I have said before that I literally pray each day as my feet roll toward the floor that God would let it be worth my while to get up. I can say with sincerety that more times than not, God knocks my slippers off with in the first five minutes! This morning was about Abraham and his faithfulness to God, even though he was almost dead! He believed God no matter what the situation or circumstance appeared. All of this was based on the theme of "Remaining positive in Negative situations" I pray that God will keep me positive and that I would be a witness and an example of God's faithfulness in My life.

I watched the video tonite with deep sadness. It's hard to believe that she stood there that particular Christmas sharing a testimony of how her son had been born with such severe problems that he wasn't expected to make it through the night. Amazingly enough, he survived, but she was dead herself by the next Christmas. No one would have realized that she would have had something to happen to her that has not yet ever been determined . She spoke of the miracle of the life of her son, yet her life was taken. How do you explain that to the son? How does her husband understand the choice of life? Questions to one day ask our Father.

Once again I am just hanging out--waiting for SOMETHING to write about. I have done nothing this afternoon other than wash clothes and dry and fold. I did go to Goodwill (YES GOODWILL!!) and found some GREAT deals to add to my collection of clothes for my trip. I found 2 pair of Eddie Bauer cordoroy pants and 3 shirts--All of which had been marked to $1.99 because they had orange tags and today was half price orange tag day!
Thank you Lord for the simple, small blessings...even at a thrift shop! I really do love a deal! Thank you for sending them my way.